The Story of Paul & Chris (Christina’s version)

Yes, I had heard of Tall Paul (who may or may not have hollow legs) and how he had demolished this guy Pete in the stairwell when he tried to assassinate a girl with a water gun during Manhunt (sidenote: I won that epic battle.) I’m at a toga party, in a borrowed floral sheet (thanks Natalia!) and sit next to this guy who has a folder of CDs open on his lap. Paul, as he has done countless times since, lured me in by discussing music, mostly Nine Inch Nails. He then convinced me and another redhead (I had red hair then too) to join him for a listening party. While this was totally innocent, I now realize how smooth that was.

 We had a great time, but then Paul and I didn't meet up again for weeks. He kept inviting me to hang out, I kept being busy, he pretty much gave up. Eventually I called him and asked him to act in a film club project and after that we were pretty inseparable friends. We listened to tons of music and Paul accidentally started my late goth phase. We watched lots of late night movies and Paul got me back into David Lynch. Then Paul asked me out for dinner, but as a date... and it's amazing this all worked out. At Harry’s Burrito, Paul proceeded to spit ice cubes across the room and smear sour cream all over his face, repeatedly. I was one half horrendously embarrassed and furious, and one half in respectful awe of his blatant disregard for social conventions. I still feel that way.

 After a particularly awkward day that we won't talk about, we both realized we wanted to date more officially. Then a month later, Paul took me out to celebrate our anniversary. I wasn't sure why two of our friends (Hi Lauren!) and some guy were there too, but they gave me flowers. Later, Paul grabbed a decaying chair out of the trash (I liked it) and the five of us brought it over to the patio at Tavern on the Green, sat down in front of the large windows, and watched the posh people eat dinner. I kept that frayed seat for 3 more years until Paul finally let me throw it out.

 The college years were awesome: directing Paul in my plays, lots of They Might Be Giants concerts, David Bowie retrospectives, film screenings, Paul taping gifts to my ceiling until I found them, me drawing friends for Paul, talking for hours, lots of Chinese food, Paul convincing large groups of people to do strange things, smuggling Australians into the dorms (Jade!), and being allies in a fake mafia. After college, we moved in together, first with roommates and then eventually just the two of us. We made up lots of creatures and songs and did some film projects together. We always figured we were in it for the long haul, but it wasn't until year 7 or 8, we started talking seriously about marriage. Year 10, we got engaged in a tiny tiny cabin in Maine that threatened to destroy our love by its sheer size and strategically placed cross beam.

 Now it’s year 12, and I am incredibly excited to marry this wonderful man that I have spent over 1/3 of my life with. We have grown up together, created worlds with our imagination, and matured into something truly sweet, passionate, silly and creative. Now I help Paul out with some of his many media projects, and he tells me he really thinks I supposed to be a puppet builder. We throw machete parties where we air chop fruit for smoothies, create some pretty incredible Halloween decorations for our festivities, stop and watch the birds hop around in puddles, always more concerts and film screenings, walk around the Village simply to get bubble tea and ice cream, go on food adventures where we eat like freak pigs, stay in to cook pink beans and rice and watch Britcoms, go to Woodstock and stand in the snow, talk for even more hours, make up even more creatures and songs... I laugh and smile everyday with Paul. And sometimes I spit an ice cube across the kitchen.

So if you haven't gotten sick from all the cuteness, know I'm so happy to have all of you with us as we celebrate our official human marriage (Paul and I have been married at least 15 times by now, none of them human). I truly hope you have a great time with us.